18 Week Update

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How far along? 18 weeks

Total weight gain: Almost back to my starting weight

Maternity clothes? I most DEFINITELY need to get some new clothes. I only have a handful if shirts that fit comfortably and I only have 3 pairs of jeans that fit. However, Mister's lounge pants are fitting pretty comfortably these days. Lol. 

Stretch marks? Oh they're coming. Almost halfway through this and my hope for minimal marks are going out of the window. 

Sleep: According to the Hubz I sleep 1 of two ways. Either I sleep like a rock, and don't move all night or I'm tossing and turning. Idk. 

Best moment this week: I barely remember this morning let alone this whole week, but so far I'd say hanging out with one of my favorite ppl is up there. Mister and I asked her and her hubby to be one of Nuggets God-Parents. They said yes with no hesitation. :-)

Miss anything? Feeling normal. I am starting to feel pregnant all the time. It's gonna be a LONG winter. 

Movement: Not really. I'm actually pretty sad about it. I really want to feel my little one moving more. 

Food cravings: Fries and gravy still. That's the only consistent thing. My appetite is returning so I am really happy about that.

Anything making you queasy or sick?: Nope.  

Gender: Still not sure of the gender. It kills me to not know, but I am getting to the point where maybe we just aren't meant to know. We have our Anatomy scan coming up next week so we'll have to see what we can find out then. 

Labor signs: Nope. 

Symptoms: My sciatica pain is coming back and the round ligament pain comes and goes. But compares to most, I have it easy. 

Belly button in or out? In! (Hopefully it stays that way.)

Wedding rings on or off? On. (I REALLY hope this also stays that way as well.)

Happy or moody most of the time: Happy. I'm really getting excited about having a baby. I dream about my little one and seeing Mister getting excited makes it all the more better. 

Looking forward to: Constant movement and know the gender. Apparently I have a one track mind. Lol. 

It's becoming real...

It's just after midnight on a Monday night and I'm laying in bed watching a chick flick crocheting my first baby blanket.

I am not following a pattern (I don't really understand them TBH) I am kind of just going with the flow. As I begin my foundation row, which is the layout for this blanket, I find myself measuring across my body and imagining holding a baby on my chest under this blanket. I wonder if this length is long enough, if it will cover my little one's legs, if it is soft enough. 

I amaze myself at how quickly and easily my mind goes there. I love it. It fills some part of my soul that I have yet to tap in to. A section of my heart that I seemed to have magically reserved just for my child. I look forward to the New Year when I can make this vision a reality. I look forward to holding my child under this blanket that Mommy created just for her/him. 

Warning: Crappy Doctors Can Cause You To End Up In The ER

I want to say Wednesday September 18th was the scariest day if my life. But it wasn't. For some reason, even though doom was staring me in the face and I was laying in an uncomfortable bed in the ER bleeding where a pregnant woman shouldn't be bleeding, I was calm. I am not sure where this mild mannered relaxed woman came from, but I became her just when i wanted to cry my eyes out. Even as the nurse tells me that she cannot find my 17wk old baby's heartbeat, I remained calm. 

See what had happened was... 

On Tuesday evening Mister and I had a regularly scheduled appointment to meet for the first time with an obstetrician from our practice and to have our biweekly sonogram done. The sono was completed and all was fine with Nugget. Growing nice and strong, but being way to modest for my liking. Why wont this kid just show us the goods already?!? The sono tech could not tell us for sure if we are having a boy or a girl yet and ou know that does NOTHING for my patience.

Anyway, after the ultrasound was done we waited for the doctor to be available. We were told a mother in labor was not progressing as they had hoped and it cause the doctor we were supposed to see to run behind. The receptionist chose to put us with the other obstetrician in the practice as we had yet to meet either and would be eventually. Just in a different order now. 

Now to her (the secondary OB) defense, we were just kinda thrown in her schedule. I don't believe it caused her to run behind, but maybe it did and she needed to rush through us to see the next clients. She was not at all what we hoped for. She was short and slightly rude and seemed like she needed to pick a new profession. Mister and I had a few questions, not a LOT but more than just 2. Each time we would ask, I didn't feel like we were given a full answer and if it were she said it in a tone that was not all too welcoming. Case and point: 

Q: Is it okay for me to perm my hair now that I'm in the 2nd trimester now? I've been trying the natural thing for almost a year now and I just don't feel like it's for me. 

A: Maybe you should look harder for other styles and options. (In a snarky tone.) Or you can do like I did and cut it all off. (She has a 2-3inch nappy halfro. I think I'll pass.)

*Cue my confusion. I don't remember asking her opinion if I should perm my hair. I asked if it was safe. I actually already knew that I was allowed to "as long as its in a well ventilated area", I just wanted the Hubz to hear it. But she did not at all give me what I was looking for. 

Next in our appt the doctor asked me if I had even having any pain and in fact I was. Besides my back, u was pretty crampy and sore in certain parts. She completely disregarded me and said "Well it's too early to be experiencing pain." 1. Obviously it's not because I am and 2. If you felt like that then why the hell did you even ask me?!?! 

But just like that the appt was over. No examination, no reassurance, and no confidence in this woman to deliver our child.

The next evening, Mister and I talked about our impressions and opinions on the doctor we met and her practice as a whole and mutually decided that this was not the place for us. It's crazy because very thing I saw, he saw and some without us even mentioning it to each other. We felt like each appt was rushed through, no one fully explained things to us and they just kinda brushed us off as the young black couple. I was slightly disappointed because I had been seeing one of the nurse practitioners since I was 16, but having a baby was a whole new ball game and she would not be able to give me care. 

Not more than an hour after Hubz and I decide to switch doctors I head upstairs to use the restroom. On my way up I feel something isn't right. I'm bleeding. Heavy and fast. After a brief freak out, we decide to wait and monitor it for an hr or so and see what happens. At this point it's almost 1am. We decide to go to the ER because we want to make sure nothing is wrong with the baby. 

I shower and we leave. We spend 10 almost 11 hours in the ER. We work with a nurse who cannot find the baby's heartbeat on the Doppler machine (*cue brief freak out,) meet with a U/S tech who immediately finds Nugget and says how active it is (Mister says Nugget looked like he/she was riding a bike kicking me,) was assaulted by the on call doctor who had NO CARE or GENTLENESS WHAT SO EVER while doing a general check and waited FOREVER to be officially discharged. 

Long story short (is it too late to say that? I mean it was already a long story... Ijs) I ended up having a ruptured cyst that had nothing to do with the baby. Not sure where or why it came, but after all these hours of none sleep I don't even care. As long as Baby is safe and Mommy isn't gonna die, I'm good. 

16 Week Update!!!

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How far along? 16 weeks 3 days

Total weight gain: Gain of 3 pounds, but still -3 from starting weight. 

Maternity clothes? Same as last week. Although, I REALLY just want to be in my sweat pants and lay in bed all day.

Stretch marks? Nothing new. But my tummy has been very itchy the past couple of days.

Sleep: I'm always tired. All I want to do it sleep. I mean I even daydream about going crawling in to my bed to sleep. Yesterday, I took my lunch break in one of the back offices and just put my head down on the desk and just slept. I honestly am about 1 sleepless night away from bring an air mattress, blanket and pillow to work, stowing it away in one of the unused offices and crashing out.

Best moment this week: Getting to sleep! A couple of nights ago the Mister felt so bad for me. I laid in a position for almost an hour because it hurt to move and I needed his help. The next day, he bought a Boppy Custom Fit Body Pillow for me. (Blog review to follow.) Let's just say, I've been sleeping like a log ever since. :o)

Miss anything? Besides a good night's sleep? (Isn't it too early for this??) I miss not being gassy all the time. I feel like I am a ticking time bomb and I feel sorry for anyone who gets in the elevator after me or my hubby at like 3 in the morning. lol. Hey just being honest! lol

Movement: I THINK so! Twice in the past 24 hours I feel like I was feeling the baby move. Like he/she is swimming around in there and they gently bump in to the front part of my belly. It actually happens whenever the Mister is talking for a long time. Either the baby likes the sound of Daddy's voice or it's trying to get away from being bored to death. lol. jk Honey! 

Food cravings: Fries and Gravy should be a staple in everyone's home. Also this week, I wanted Lil' Caesar's Pizza and a taco... at the same time. I only got the pizza, but I waiting on that taco still.

Anything making you queasy or sick?: Nope.  

Gender: No confirmation yet. The next update should tell you the gender. That is IF Hubby and I decide to start telling ppl. We don't know yet. I'm still holding out hope that it's a girl and Mister is telling to stop being delusional, girls don't have a chance. We'll see who wins this one. lol. I think even if we see that it's a girl he will still believe a boy will be born and same goes for me just opposite. 

Labor signs: Nope. 

Symptoms: Tiredness, headaches and round ligament stretches that are kinda painful.

Belly button in or out? In! (Hopefully it stays that way.)

Wedding rings on or off? On. (I REALLY hope this also stays that way as well.)

Happy or moody most of the time: I haven't burned down the house or my job yet, so I'd say that's a good week.

Looking forward to: To being sure what I am feeling is the baby, start getting items for the baby and also to know the gender. Tuesday cannot come soon enough.

15 Week Update!!!

** No picture this week because I'm just too tired. I also forgot and when I remembered, I wasn't feeling like I looked very pregnant. Just fat -_- **

How far along? 15 weeks 4 days

Total weight gain: Still no gain. -6 from starting weight, but same size as last week

Maternity clothes? Still wearing my pregnancy jeans as they are the most comfortable option. But I am definitely going to need some maternity shirts soon. The length of my current shirts don't seem long enough and you can see the elastic band of my jeans too much. 

Stretch marks? Nothing new. Just that first one. I've been walking around like a greased pig in the summer to try and fend off any more pop ups. Lol. (Weird analogy I know, but I bet the visual made you smile. :-)

Sleep: It seems to take me a while to get to sleep at night and because of that I have been exhausted in the mornings and throughout the day. I feel like I can never get enough sleep. I thought the energy was supposed to come back I'm the second trimester! Smh. 

Best moment this week: Just being with my Mister. It's difficult to go to work in the am, be gone all day, sit in 695 traffic both ways and try to feign energy when I get home. Today, we had no plans and we just jumped in the truck and just drove. We used to do it all the time, but as for that beast is not cheap. Lol. But it really was nice to just spend the day getting lost on back roads in farmlands with my hubby. If only just for a couple of hours. We zone out, actually drive the speed limit and talk about every random thing that hits our minds. It's one thing that I hope doesn't change after the kids come. :-)

Miss anything? My energy and the desire to eat. Yesterday I had a donut, half a cup of soup, a $1 bag of granny chips and 2 small soft pretzels. I had no desire to eat any real food. I literally had to force down a small bowl of cereal at the end of the night just to be able to take my prenatals. Nothing seems to appeal to me and the only reason I am even trying to force feed myself is for Nugget. 

Movement: Not 100% sure. A couple of days ago I felt what I can only describe as 3 knocks on the bottoms left sideof my tummy. I know Nugget likes to hang out there. I'm not really sure if it was the baby or like a slight muscle spams. Either way, it caught me off guard as made me smile at the possibility it was my baby moving. 

Food cravings: Nothing unusual this week. If I have to put anything I guess I'd say fries and gravy and soft pretzels. But I love those items even without beig knocked up. Lol. 

Anything making you queasy or sick?: Nope.  

Gender: Well.... We did have an ultrasound done this week. The tech says she is 75% sure she knows the gender. She told us her guess, but I have not accepted it 100%. For one, it took her WAAAAYYYY too long to decide either way. Two, she was 50/50 for most of the appointment and three, to me, 25% is still too big of a percent. I don't want to start purchasing things for one gender over the other only to be told differently next month. So I'll wait until our next U/S at 17weeks or our Anatomy scan at 20 weeks to be sure. 

Labor signs: Nope. But during our U/S the tech said I was have an contraction. My tummy has been crampy and achy all over this week and so I assume it was more contractions. But the tech said it was normal. 

Symptoms: Nothing besides the crampy gassy feeling in my tummy. There are times I feel a fullness and other times I I feel nothing. 

Belly button in or out? In! (Hopefully it stays that way.)

Wedding rings on or off? On. (I REALLY hope this also stays that way as well.)

Happy or moody most of the time: I think I've been pretty good this week. The Mister has been awesome and has been helping me with my mood swings. 

Looking forward to: Still looking forward to feeling movement and now add gender to the list. I want to know the gender 100% for sure. 

*** For some reason, we have already had a bunch of ppl ask us about the baby shower. When is it? Where? Co-Ed? Mister and I never thought we'd be thinking/talking about this event so soon, but it is kind of exciting. 

Mister and I decided that we want a co-ed baby shower. It's his baby as well and there are far more males in his family than females. I don't want to exclude my hubby unneccessarily. We also decided that we would like to host the shower in the middle of January. The holiday season would be done and we would also not be too close to our due date. I'm hoping by choosing a date so early, his family can make plans and more of an effort to come to the shower. No one was able to come to my bridal shower and it would mean so much to me if they do come to this. 

Also, we LOVE the idea of a "Despicable Me" or "Minion" themed baby shower. Mister was looking online for stuff for the nursery the other day and came across THE CUTEST saying/theme: "One in a Minion." I LOVE it!! I do not know where this love for Despicable Me Came from, but I am so excited. I know that I am not the one in charge of throwing this whole shindig, but this theme is just too cute to pass up. 

Nursery Decor Ideas (If It's a Girl)

Now as much as I LOVE Love love my idea for the Despicable Me themed nursery, I kinda love being girly girl a tiny bit more. So I think it's natural for me to want to have a pretty pink and purple nursery if we find out that we're having a girl. While I do not plan to go over board like fluffy pink unicorn exploded in a girl's room, I would like to room to have some femininity.

So for right now, my top color scheme choice is Coral and Navy. A bit unconventional for a nursery I think, but still really beautiful together. I came across this pin while on Pinterest and fell completely head over heels.

I LOVE everything about it. It's dainty without being over kill. You can paint the walls either cream, light grey or navy and just have coral accents. That way if the next baby happens to be a boy, the main colors of the room does not have to change. Here are a few more idea I have if this little one turns out to be a girl.

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And just because it's me, I may have to throw in a fluffy unicorn to complete the space.

Nursery Decor Ideas (If it's a Boy...)

Being the typical DIY'er that I am, I immediately started thinking of how to decorate the nursery once we find out the gender of this little Nugget. I've been stalking Pinterest, baby forums and any link that looked promising. I came across a LOT of different concepts that I love, but just would not work for us.

A Few examples:

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Each of these nurseries are beautiful for different reasons, but I KNOW that the Mister would not be too fond of that last one. Oh well!

So I began to think about what type and scheme nursery would I want for our child? I say "I" because the Mister could not care less. He does however, care how much I'll be putting him to work, so I guess I'll have to keep it simple... at least in theory. lol. And then it hit me! Like a lighting bolt from the sky!

By George I think I've got it!!! Nurseries, do not HAVE to be based on same kids characters (ie Winnie the Pooh, Disney Princess.) They CAN be just a palette of colors. But what if that palette of colors comes from one of the best movies EVER?!? 

To understand where I am going with this, you have to understand that Mister and I LOVE animated kids movies. "Meet the Robinsons", "Ratatouille" and "The Incredibles" are among our favorite. However, in recent years a new movie has taken the top spot in our hearts. It's technically a kids movie, but like "Shrek" it's good for the whole family. And as much as we love this movie I am sure that Baby Adams will feel the same way. And if not too bad! lol. But how do I turn a movie in to a nursery theme???????        *Cue the mininons!

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That's right! Baby Adams will have a "DESPICABLE ME" themed nursery!!!!! 

*Cue Vector!

Now the question becomes, how do we make this happen? I mean it's not like I can just go out and purchase crib bedding with mininons all over it or curtains worthy of Agnes, Edith and Margo. I'd have to be creative. And that is when I turned back to my constant addiction . I started searching the web and compiling a pin board with all my ideas. Honestly, if you are a Mom, Bride to be, DYI'er or a recipe collector and you're not on Pinterest, you are doing your self a disservice. lol. It really is amazing. (If you are on Pinterest, come follow me :-))

Anywho, these are my ideas to make this ---->   in to a nursery worthy of a little Baby Adams. I hope it turns out the way I envision it. I would like it to be blue, yellow and slight grey with touches of minions. So we'll see. 

                  

 

What if it's a boy?!?

** The following post was written during a  brief panic attack of a first time mom to be. 

All in all this week as been good. Seeing my husband get so excited about this baby is amazing. He is the only one i let touch the belly and he has already started talking to the baby. He has not wavered and is still convinced that Nugget is a boy. I am still unsure. 

I do not have that mother's intuition just yet. I guess because this whole hint is still crazy and surreal to me. I can say that I am nervous though. 

What if Nugget is a boy? What the hell am I supposed to do with him? I am as girls girl as they come. I mean, i remember my tomboy days, but those did not last long. And I was still a girly girl at heart. I just liked hanging with the boys. And playing football.  How am I supposed to fit in with a son and a man's man as a husband. These two will be ripping and running, jumping off houses, playing every sport possible and come in the house bloody and bruised. Where do I fit in?

Mister and I have talked about this a few times and I know that it's not competition between the two of us, but I just can't help the thought of feeling confused and left out. I don't know boys. I know bows and dresses. I know tea time and princess tiaras, not ninjas and race cars and certainly not worms, dirt, bugs and blood. I really want Nugget to be a boy, because I know that it would mean the world to Mister, but I can't hold back the desire for it to be a girl. At least I'll stand a chance. Lol. 

The Past is just that...

Those close to me know my past. I have held on to the hurt for years and now that history has a chance to repeat itself, I have finally understood that I NEED to let go and let God. So I will speak on this one last time.

A month before I met my amazing husband, in February 2008, I had a miscarriage. I was in a long term relationship with the wrong man and as fate would have it, I became pregnant. We were at the end of time together and it was not planned in the least bit, but that's what happened. Without going in to the little particulars, I pretty much dealt with the surprise of being pregnant alone. I was 20 years old, back to living with my mom and just all around confused. I remember the day I lost my pregnancy like it was yesterday. I would not wish it upon anyone. I was 12 weeks pregnant and almost out in the clear and just like that, it was gone.

Now it may be a bit morbid, but I do honestly say that God had a plan for me and that miscarriage was what was need at that time. He knew that the jerk I was with was not who I was meant to be connected to for ever. And I feel that He knew that I deserved more, even though I didn't. The reason I bring this all up now, is because I am once again in my twelfth week of pregnancy and I cannot kick this fear from my mind. I know my situation is totally different now, but it is a real fear. For some women, staying pregnant is really difficult. I've seen women on the boards talk about having 3+ miscarriages. I could not imagine. 

In this moment, I wash my hands of the past and try my best to enjoy this pregnancy as much as possible.